By: Alexandra Călinescu

Do you like crying? Do you enjoy that feeling you get after you cry?

when your face is all so…wept and wet

yet, somehow… pictorial…

and your eyes dry up

and you get the feeling that

although you might not be doing anything in particular,

no work, no nothing,

you still pour something out of yourself

and slowly become consumed by this weeping,

able, still, to feel its traces on your cheek…

I sometimes like to cry.

Although many people (myself included)

are quite ugly when they cry

crying seems so… aesthetically pleasant… pure and beautiful…

and that feeling of flowing and flowing and flowing parts of yourself…

very fall-like… the fall from Twin Peaks… The Great Northern…

you just can’t seem to stop … it keeps on gushing and gushing

and then there’s that… post-crying glimmer… laced all over your face…

And… and… I don’t know, I didn’t describe it the way I’d wanted to…

I erupted today. (won’t elaborate, won’t talk, reason already known)

because my heart only wants one thing

and that it cannot have…

Anyway… I noticed afterwards how blissful it was to touch those withered eyelids after crying

it was like… that feeling of liberation you get

when you are in the balcony at nightfall

and the air smells like frozen flowers…

no, actually it felt as though

I were sitting in the middle of a lily pad

while it was pouring outside

but I were tiny and protected by the petals.